Don’t Rub Butter in Puss Mouth

How many times have you heard women lament that their best friend ‘stole’ their man? A woman ending up with her best friend’s boyfriend is not strange, it happens more often than we think. I don’t believe anyone can ‘steal’ a man or woman from their partner. A person cannot be made to leave you unless they want to but sometimes a woman, without even realizing it, can create opportunities for her man to get with other women.

Good men exist but good doesn’t mean perfect and this is a lesson too many women are yet to grasp. While some men do love and respect their women very much and will not go seeking opportunities to cheat, a different scenario exists when a woman places temptation within easy reach of her man. That temptation comes in the form of other females who are close to her, including best friend/s and relatives.

Remember most men do not need to love a woman, to desire her. Although there are men who would prefer to lock themselves away to avoid the temptation of cheating with an attractive female, who is basically being handed to them on a platter, there are others who will definitely seize the opportunity. In some cases, it does not mean he always wanted to cheat on his woman but here is a situation where he didn’t even have to put any real effort into hunting.

 Here are some key things to note:

1.    Not every man has the will power to refuse an attractive woman- Men are highly visual beings. Even if a man loves you, it doesn’t mean he wont find other women attractive. If a man feels a strong sexual desire for a woman who is easily available to him, he rarely thinks about what will happen after he gets with her. The prey came right into his hands and his first instinct is normally to have the meal then deal with the repercussions afterward.  It’s the depth of love and respect he has for you, his principles, a genuine desire to not hurt you and will power that help him remain loyal.

2.     A good girlfriend is a gem to have, but a girlfriend loving you, doesn’t mean she wont be jealous of what you have- There are some loyal girlfriends who would never for a moment consider flirting with or trying to get with their friend’s boyfriend/husband. However, there are many who certainly will, if the opportunity presents itself. Ideally we would want a world where there are people who have no room for certain feelings in their heart but every human being is capable of feelings of jealousy and envy. For women, that includes being jealous of the man in your life, especially if he treats you well.

3.    Establish boundaries with females who stay over at your house—if a female friend or relative is visiting for an extended period, be sure to have a talk with them before the first night they stay over. Let them understand what you expect in terms of how they present themselves around your spouse. Nothing is wrong with telling them that revealing clothes should not be worn in the presence of your spouse. It’s your house. Anyone who visits should respect your rules.

4.    Don’t be an enabler to your own peril--- There are women who have a very trusting relationship with their female friends and feel very comfortable about them spending time alone with their spouse. Some women even ask their girlfriends to accompany their boyfriend to places, without them. Depending on the level of trust that exists between yourself and your partner and yourself and your friend, there might not be any reason to think this could backfire. But be mindful that the more time a person spends in the company of another, the greater the bond they develop, so don’t get too comfortable with this practice.

5.    You don’t need to be Matlock but you need to be wise - A man is an adult and if he values what he has with you, you shouldn’t have to go out of your way to keep him from slipping up. This is the logical view, but the truth is that we are imperfect beings seeking a perfect relationship which is just not possible so a smart woman will not set herself and her relationship up for drama. Men know how other men think and that is why most are wary of even their own friends being alone with their women. A woman should start thinking like a man when it comes to protecting what she has. Simply put, no female associate whether it is a close friend, colleague or relative, should be left alone with your man for any extended period…especially if she isn’t in a happy relationship. Don’t rub butter in puss mouth.