7 Things a Woman Really Needs In a Man

As women, we sometimes believe we have it well thought through in terms of what we want in

a man, but we often overlook something very important—the things we really need in a man. Whilst a woman might not want anyone to tell her what kind of man she should be with, certain toxic patterns call for self-reflection. For instance, you tell yourself that you want a certain kind of man, yet despite being constantly lucky in finding that kind of man, the relationships simply do not work.

If you constantly go for the handsome, career guy who is financially secure, yet you have to compete relentlessly with other women for his attention, and he has little time to spend with you, you might want to look at needs versus wants.  Perhaps you want these types of men but they are not meeting your needs and you really need a guy who is less focused on climbing the corporate ladder, one is able to invest more time into building the relationship.

Your man doesn’t need to be handsome for your relationship to work, hence good looks isn’t a need. Needs are required for your overall well-being, they are like the oxygen in your relationship, wants aren’t necessarily so. However, we tend to become more caught up with what we want, rather than what we need. Wants tend to be superficial, while needs are more substance.  In relationships, misunderstanding your needs can make a significant difference between happiness and a life of misery. 

Here are seven things a woman really needs in a man.

1     A man who makes time for her---  A woman wants attention and quality time with her man. A man who does not spend time with his woman ignores her to his own peril. Regardless of how well he provides for her, if he does not take care of her emotional needs, the relationship is at risk. A man who makes time to do things with his woman is a keeper.  What she will never forget is if you cancel something else just to spend time with her.

2     A man who will talk and listen --- Men in general do not like to sit and talk or listen to their women for too long but guess what? She needs you to talk and listen so make the time. Women like to express themselves verbally. When a man sits and listens to what she has to say, it means a lot to her and don’t be trying to watch your favourite game at the same time she is speaking with you.

3     A man who respects and appreciates her--- A woman’s work is never done. Whether it is being a fulltime stay at home mom, or trying to juggle her career and taking care of the kids while ensuring her man’s needs are taken care of, it’s a lot of work.  Women need to feel respected and appreciated. A man doesn’t have to tell his woman ‘I love you’ every day but ensure she knows by your actions, that you respect and appreciate her.

4     A man who understands the importance of financial security---he doesn’t have to be rich but a woman needs a man who takes seriously his role as a provider. Whether or not his woman is earning her own money, a woman needs a man who values taking care of his household.

5     A man who never stops romancing her--- Long after the courtship is over, a woman still wants to be romanced by her man. Send her little love notes, romantic text messages in the middle of the work day, or just a simple ‘how’s your day going?’ to show her you are thinking about her.  Whatsapp her a song that sums up how you feel about her, have flowers delivered to her at work, these are all little romantic gestures that women need from a man.

6     A man who isn’t afraid to show emotions—There are some men who will never tell his woman I love you. He might do the things to make her comfortable but stays away from doing the things that he thinks makes him appear ‘soft’. The simple fact is some men are not comfortable expressing love sometimes because of how they were brought up. However women need to feel loved. Show her you love her and do not be afraid to tell her too.

7     A man who will protect her—Women like to have a sense of being secure so they like  to know that their men can and will protect them. A woman wants to know that if a situation arises, her man will not run away and leave her to fend for herself. A woman needs a man in whom she can have that kind of confidence.

Marie Berbick aka The PR Girl, is a Motivational Speaker, Communications Specialist, award-winning journalist and founder of the women’s ministry Sisters United for Prayer, Healing, Empowerment & Restoration. (SUPHER). Follow her on twitter @thePR Girl. Email marieberbick@gmail.com